Can You Smell What Barack Is Cooking?

I know candidates pander all the time to voters, but can you believe what happened the other night on WWE Raw? The three remaining Presidential candidates all were invited to give statements, and they all contained horrible horrible puns.

HORRIBLE. Can you smell what Barack is cooking? Hill-Rod? McCainiacs? Really??


Clinton:
Hi, I’m Hillary Clinton. But tonight, in honor of the WWE, you can call me Hill-Rod.

This election is starting to feel a lot like “King of the Ring.” The only difference? The last man standing may just be a woman.

The truth is, this election is so important. The next president will face a stack full of difficult challenges right from the opening bell… to fix the economy, bring our troops home from Iraq, and make college more affordable. You need a president who will go to the mat for you. And that’s exactly what I’ll do.

I’ve been knocked down, but I’ve always gotten back up. And I know how to take a hit for the American people. And if things get a little tough, I may even have to deliver the “people’s elbow.”

Because this country is worth fighting for.

Now, I promise to stick to the political arena. So don't worry Randy Orton you're safe… for now.

When it comes to standing up for the American people though, I am ready to rumble.

Obama:

Hey WWE fans - I hope you're all enjoying the program tonight. You know, this is a historic time for America. It's not just that the reign of Randy Orton may soon be coming to an end. It's that at this moment, in this election, we have a chance to finally end business-as-usual in Washington. For a long time now, we've had a politics where our leaders go after each other like they're competing to become King of the Ring instead of coming together to provide universal health care, fix our economy, and solve our other problems. That's what I'm running for President to change. So to the special interests who've been setting the agenda in Washington for too long - and to all the forces of division and distraction that have stopped us from making progress for the American people - I've got one question: Do you smell what Barack is cooking?

McCain:
"Looks like Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama want to celebrate their differences in the ring," McCain says. "Well, that's fine with me, but let me tell you: If you want to be the man, you have to beat the man. Come November, it'll be game over. And whatcha gonna do when John McCain and all his McCainiacs run wild on you?"